"They had to change the rules for Muralitharan. Otherwise someone would get blown up"
- Michelle Ainsworth
28.08.2006

Recently, I've been wondering. Why do some people get it so great over others. Oddly enough, it was Dean Geyer of Australian Idol fame who got me thinking down this path. I thought I'd share with all three of my avid readers the amazing similarities and differences of two people whose lives crossed paths, if ever so briefly.

Dean Geyer v Michael O'Donnell
Similarities:

• Both attended Melbourne High School (Dean graduating in 2004, Michael finishing a year later)
• Both competed in the hurdles at at least two MHS sports carnivals. (Although I don't remember, I feel confident in suggesting Dean ran an astonishingly faster time)

That just about covers the similarities.

Differences

• Dean Geyer is a good looking young man. He is a black belt in some martial art which inevitably equals a good body. He has the ability to tan well, and hold onto a tan.
• Michael O'Donnell is particularly unattractive. He has failed at every sport he has played, which means he has a skinny body. He turns red in the sun, not brown.
• Dean Geyer is a talented singer and guitarist who is currently competing for the title of Australian Idol in front of the entire nation.
• Michael O'Donnell has no talents. Hidden or obvious.
• Dean Geyer is likely to make a lot of money with his singing ability
• Michael O'Donnell is trying toenter a profession which is known to provide very little money.

It's all very demoralising isn't it. Type my name into google and you get Doctors and Professors, none of which are me. Type Dean Geyer into the same search engine. He has his own wikipedia section! He has his own fan forum with hundreds of registered posters! Where are my screaming and swooning women?

We all have friends just like him though don't we? Great friends who we love catching up with. Though, isn't it always the case when you discover something ELSE he's better than you at, all you can think in your head is 'you prick' while forcing a polite smile on your face.

As I watched Australian Idol, I was sat fighting hard to think of something that I would be better than Dean Geyer at. What could I be better at than this good looking, intelligent, talented musician? Then it came to me.

Dean Geyer can't goal umpire for shit.

This website is a supporter of Dean Geyer in his quest to become Australian Idol

Vote Dean.

MySpace

I've just started this thing - its all a bit high-tech and complicated for me.
If you have it - go to http://www.myspace.com/oddes
Add me as a friend. I need friends.

Then tell me how to fancy it up a bit.

"Australia would be a better place without Tasmania. We should give it away."
- Carla Kwaifeo-Okai
21.08.2006

"You should be able to shoot anyone who makes a stupid call at the soccer to warn off the others"
- Brett Herskope
18.8.06

The Story Behind a 4.10am Phone Call

Terror on Melbourne Streets

After deliriously having pressed the wrong button and hanging up on a phone call during the early hours of Friday morning, I lay in bed wondering why on earth someone would have called me at this ungodly time. Not even with the possible stories running around in my head at that time could I have imagined the horror facing 'Neale' and his friends after a quiet night out.

'Neale Watson', 'Jack Haughton' and 'Tom Tronso' (not real names), were on their way home when they found themselves passing a McDonalds. They requested the taxi driver to pull over and wait for them while they went in to quench their hunger. The taxi driver refused point blank to do the friendly thing, and, rather than then informing them that they had to pay him, attempted to force the boys back into the cab. The cab driver, named Habib, who wore an eyepatch and had a hook in place of a missing left hand, began to get increasingly violent and that's when the real activity of the night began.
'Neale' answered questions about the incident exclusively for Oddes and Associates.
'We just asked the cab driver if he could wait for 5 minutes while we ran in. Doesn't he know that after a few drinks you get hungry like the children of Africa?'
Clearly, he didn't. After the boys rightly refused to pay Habib after he became aggressive, the cab driver tried to hold the boys down and told them he was calling the police. Fearing for their lives, the boys fled into a nearby supermarket carpark.

This was only the start of the horror that faced 'Neale' and his friends that evening, as Habib, who psychologists we contacted said appears to be showing signs of
Angryatwhattheworldhaddealthimitis, continued to stalk the boys while in his car. When he spotted them, he began to chase the boys, who remained on foot, in his car. Once again fearing for their own safety, the boys fled into an alleyway and tried to hide within the garbage. The cab driver proceeded to get out of car, and fetch what appeared to be a long metal pole from the boot of his cab. He then stalked the alleyway, with the boys fearing that he would strike them with this pole if he saw them. After a number of close calls, Habib failed to spot the boys and drove off in his car. The boys then fled the alley, climbing a large barb-wired fence (which has caused permanent scarring to the each of the boys' hands, and caused thousands of dollars damage to expensive designer clothing which was ripped), and continued to run for a number of minutes into an open park. It was at this stage that 'Tom' went missing from the group.

Just when the 'Neale' and 'Jack's' hearts were beginning to slow down and they began to worry about the whereabouts of their friend, they heard the screeching sounds of a car breaking and turning quickly. They turned to see, to their horror, the taxi driver moving at break-neck speed towards them. Without having time to think, the boys jumped into some bushes in order to hide Habib, who the boys recall to have smelt distinctly like alcohol and bomb making equipment. Habib then formed a stake-out, sitting in his vehicle shining full-beam lights into the bushes. The boys, still fearing the worst for their missing friend who they assumed to be dead and in the boot of the maniacal cab drivers car, were forced to sit and wait for two long hours in the freezing cold temperatures before the taxi driver, who the boys could see was continuing to drink from a hip flask during the stake-out, turned his car around and drove away.

After several desperate attempts to locate their friend 'Tom', as well as glancing looks over their shoulder for Habib in his yellow and green stationwagon from hell, 'Neale' and 'Jack' began attempts to call friends to rescue them. After several anxious hours, a friend was able to come, and picked the two shaking boys up and took them home. They used the remaining hours until day break attempting to call 'Tom's' mobile, but all they managed to do was leave several messages.

Today, Tom remains unaccounted for and presumed dead by police.

If you see a cab driver named Habib with an eyepatch and a hook in place of his left arm, police urge you to contact Crime Stoppers immediately.